Slain Ride

What's the first thought you have when you think of a destination vacation? A nice sunny beach? A popular new tourist town? An exciting theme park? Or maybe even just the comforts of your living room?

Well in the case of the plans of leisure that our featured vacationers have - it's none of the above. Instead this group is headed off to the mountains for a weekend stay at a lodge in a winter wonderland in the Andes Mountains. Three days and two nights filled with snow, hot chocolate and toasty down comforters. Now I'm sure that one question is plaguing your mind. Who exactly are these snow-bound vacationers? None other than the Lupin Gang! Believe it or not even thieves get tired and need to recharge their batteries for the next heist. And as they sat down trying to decide on where to settle for their rest and recreation, Lupin came up with a fantastic idea. And for once it was fantastic in a genuine way - not a sarcastic one.

He reached out to one of his many contacts and called in a favor. The guy was the owner of a popular resort in the Andes Mountains. As in booked months to a full year in advance and you're lucky to get a spot in one of the supply closets type of popular. And anyone else wouldn't have even been able to get that much. Of course, Lupin the 3rd isn't anyone else. The resort owner not only booked the team of four in but he gave them a really sweet deal on the overall price.

So here they were - on a gondola ski lift that was slowly but surely guiding them upwards to the town where Lupin's contact would meet them to pick them up for the lodge.

"Man, it's been ages since we've been in the Andes! I forgot how beautiful it is here." Lupin said as he turned around in his seat to look out the window.

"I know. The last time we passed through here was when we robbed that antique dealer at his estate in Peru. But we couldn't stick around to enjoy the sights." Fujiko said as she looked outside the window of the gondola.

"The snow is simply immaculate up here. It's like a blanket made of freshly spun silk." Goemon commented as he observed the crisp, clean snow on the mountains and ground.

"And it sure beats being in a hot safe house with no AC. Speaking of, boss, what can you tell us about this contact of yours? You said he dealt in real estate." Jigen said as he turned to his best friend and leader.

"Oh yeah! His name's Ambrose Gatsby. He's actually one of the first contacts I ever made when I started out. Whenever I need a sleek yet out of the way safe house - he's the guy I call. And in return I give him a heads up for prime spots of land to buy and build new houses or spas on." Lupin explained.

"It figures. Only you would suggest to make a resort in the Andes, Lupin. And you can't get more out of the way than this." Fujiko commented with an impressed smile.

"I'd say that's all the better really. It means that we'll finally get to enjoy some time off without being recognized by anyone. And even if they figure out our identities we'll already be refreshed and long gone once the weekend passes." Goemon replied with an optimistic and eager expression. At this Jigen smiled himself and wrapped an arm around the samurai's waist.

"Glad to hear you're all for that, Goemon. Because I got a few ideas on how I can help you 'refresh' for the weekend." Jigen replied as he pulled his boyfriend a bit closer, which made the slightly younger man blush.

"Hee, hee, hee! Not that I mind the preview show, fellas, but I think it's only proper vacation etiquette to save the hanky panky for when we get our rooms at the resort." Lupin replied with a mischievous giggle.

At this Goemon cast a glare to the master thief and struck him in the knee with the hilt of his Zantetsuken, which made Lupin yelp dramatically in pain and clutch his knee.

"Another remark from you, Lupin, and the next preview you get will be for a martial arts exhibition." Goemon stated, trying to look serious despite his blush.

"Ah! That actually reminds me, we need to go over our cover names and backstories one last time." Fujiko said. "Geeze, again Fujiko? We went over this twice back in Japan, three times when we boards the plain, twice more when we got off it and another two times when we got on the gondola." Jigen groaned.

"Well consider this our chance to round it up to an even ten, Jigen. Besides - the last thing we need is a slip of the tongue that could tip off any police." Fujiko pointed out.

"Fujicakes is right. Last thing we need is to blow our cover while we're blowing on our hot chocolate, after all." Lupin said.

"Exactly! So let's start from the top. Lupin, your name is Paul Sernine and you come from old money that's a mix of archaeologists and winemakers going back generations. You're here to vacation incognito to away from nosy paparazzi." Fujiko said, gesturing to the master thief.

"Nice! Cultured and adventurous. The very foundation of my family name!" Lupin exclaimed as he gave a proud smile.

"Tch, right. Your foundation is gaudy taste in furniture and food combos that would make a pregnant woman vomit, boss." Jigen said.

"Hey! Don't knock popcorn with marshmallow fluff and chili oil until you've tried it! Me, dad, mom and grandpa had that every movie night for years as our traditional snack. It's a regular Lupin Family recipe. Other thief families even tried to steal it, I'll have you know." Lupin stated.

"Respectfully, Lupin, I don't think that other thieves wanting to take a recipe that can only be useful as a form of chemical warfare is the type of thing you should brag about." Goemon said with a light grin to which the master thief blew a raspberry in response.

"Alright, back on topic! Jigen your name is Jericho Moore. You're a Marine veteran who was honorably discharged and you came into millions after your dearly departed great uncle passed away and left you stocks that matured and a lot of real estate. Now you're traveling the world and knocking off all those things you wanted to do from your bucket list. One of those things being staying in the Andes for a snow trip." Fujiko explained as she gestured to the gunman.

"Eh, never really been into stocks. They're like roller coasters. They go up and down, and that rush is only temporary. Real estate ain't too bad an investment, though. But I would only go for places that have the best bars in their towns." Jigen commented.

"Well just pretend that the real estate is for areas with good bars and that the stocks actually turned out good. As for me, I'm going to be my chief and editor of Tokyo Life persona, Aiko Kawasaki. I'm taking a break from reporting to recharge my batteries and follow up on recommendations given to me about many cute little local mom and pop shops and restaurants." Fujiko explained with a smile.

"Speaking of Tokyo Life, how's little Maria doing? Must be pretty intense acting as the boss when you're not around." Lupin said.

"For anyone else it would be, but not for Maria. She's got the spirit of a real news hound. She absolutely nailed the last three celebrity interviews covered in this month's issue - and she secured exclusive coverage for Tokyo's biggest embezzlement case that's going on." Fujiko replied proudly. Then she turned to Goemon. "Now as for you, Goemon, your name for this trip is Tsubasa Hagihara. And you're a cosplayer rising to fame after your recent debut at a convention in the States. You also go by Tsusu and you have a cutesy accent. You're here to get inspiration for a new winter themed cosplay for your next convention."

"Ugh, do I really have to be a cosplayer Fujiko? Just the persona alone makes me roll my eyes and feel an immense embarrassment. Why can't I be a Kabuki actor? I'd even accept being an Onnagata." Goemon said.

"I told you, Goemon. A cosplayer is the least suspicious option, and it'll give your sword a pass so it doesn't get confiscated since everyone will think it's a well-made prop. Besides - you need the practice. You always play serious roles for your disguises with our heists. So a vacation is the perfect chance for you to play a more easygoing role." Fujiko explained with a smile.

"Hmph. I suppose you have a point...but still! I can't imagine being such an airheaded person." Goemon said with a cringing expression.

"Don't be like that! You're not some airhead. You just live in the moment. Now - onto how we all came to meet. Lupin, I interviewed you while I was at a news conference in Paris. Our relationship slowly evolved from professional to personal - and now we're having a romantic trip in the Andes." Fujiko explained.

"I like that cover! What's say we practice, Fujicakes?" Lupin asked as he reached down for a kiss, only for the cat burglar to move to the left and flick his nose. "Ouch!"

"Nice try, but I'm sure people will get the gist of it, lover. As for you and Goemon, Jigen, you two met when you decided to go to a convention out of curiosity. You went to Goemon's booth and got a photograph with him. Goemon found your whole presence cool and interesting and you both had a date after the convention. While you're polar opposites you can't help but adore one another! So you wanted to fully commit to the relationship by taking a trip together." Fujiko explained further, gesturing to the two men.

"See Goemon? You're not an airhead at all. Just a silver fox chaser. That make you feel better?" Lupin asked with a mischievous grin which made the samurai glare at him, although it looked less intimidating with the blush on his face.

"So much better, rich boy. Thanks a lot." Goemon said sarcastically with a roll of his eyes.

"Hey, don't be mad. After all even though I come from old money - I could never afford the VIP shows of your 'exclusive cosplays' that Jigen gets to enjoy. Hee, hee, he---YEOWCH!!" Lupin's signature laugh was cut off by a wail as a sharp pain shot up his leg from the sudden kick that Jigen landed on the knee opposite to the one Goemon struck with the sheath of his Zantetsuken earlier.

"I'd be careful with what I say up here, Lupin. Not many knee specialists in the Andes. And you're already two for two." Jigen replied as he casually lit a new cigarette and took a breath of smoke, completely tuning out Lupin's pained whines and Fujiko's eye rolls while silently reveling in Goemon's chuckles.

Eventually the gondola cabin slowly came to a stop, the haul rope letting out a low hiss as it wound tightly around the wheels as if it was letting the passengers know they had arrived at their destination. The Lupin Gang stood up from the couch seats and smiled at one another eagerly before walking to the doors. The automatic doors let out a soft ding as they slid open - unveiling a picturesque scene of the open air landing port for the gondola filled with people happily chatting away, a cafe that you could smell the fresh grounds from even at a distance to the left, a gift shop with all sorts of novelty and quaint little trinkets lining the shelves and displayed in the window to the right and a massive ice sculpture on top of a stone base at the center. Lupin looked around at the area for a moment, took in a deep breath and exhaled with an excited smile.

"Oh yeah! This is gonna be an epic vacation. Now we just need to find Ambrose out of this crowd." Lupin said as he squinted his eyes and searched around for his contact.

Just then a cheery, posh sounding European accent cut through the space.

"Well now! Is that a certain third of his name that I see, or do my eyes deceive me and I just happened upon someone else with freakishly long sideburns?" Asked the voice.

Lupin immediately turned to his right and was greeted by none other than Ambrose Gatsby, striding over to the group with literal open arms. Ambrose was a handsome man; a toned physique that was decked out in designer winter apparel, vibrant blue eyes surrounded by a chiseled diamond head shape that matched the wintry scene and shoulder-length dark red hair and sun- kissed skin that contrasted but also suited his look. His teeth showed as he smiled to Lupin - revealing rows of pristine pearly whites. If Lupin didn't tell them that Ambrose was into real estate Jigen, Fujiko and Goemon would have definitely mistaken him for a model or celebrity. Upon seeing his friend and contact Lupin met Ambrose halfway and opened his own arms to give the other man a hug.

"Ambrose! Good to see you, old man! It's been way too long." Lupin said happily as he hugged Ambrose.

"Ha, ha, ha! Old man? Just because I have five months on you doesn't mean I'm retirement homeward bound, you know. Now let me get a look at you." Ambrose said, pulling away to look at the master thief. "Goodness, you look good man. It's like you're the same as you were when you first started your 'nightly work' and we met."

"What can I say? All of that 'extreme evening cardio' does a body good. Especially when you have 'dedicated spotters' making sure I don't slack off." Lupin replied, subtly hinting at the many runs from the law he had across many a rooftop with police hot on his heels.

"I'm sure. Now then, shall I assume that this charming entourage are the friends you spoke of?" Ambrose said, looking over Lupin's shoulder to look at the other thieves.

"Sure are! Ambrose, this is Jigen Daisuke. The best marksman across all points of the compass. Fujiko Mine - the person who Aphrodite took heavy inspiration from. And Goemon Ishikawa the 13th, the number one swordsman out there. And gang, this is Ambrose Gatsby." Lupin said, introducing everyone to Ambrose and vice versa.

"Hey there." Jigen greeted casually.

"Charmed to meet you." Fujiko greeted with a wink.

"It's an honor to make your acquaintance." Goemon spoke politely as he gave a bow.

"Well met! The honor is all mine. And to keep it even, allow me to introduce a friend of my own. Get over here, Percy!" Ambrose called, turning behind to speak to someone.

A new figure then approached the small group. Another man. This one having a lankier figure, and his face was rather gaunt compared to Ambrose's chiseled features with his pale skin almost matching the color of the snow. He had short brunette hair that was slicked, brown eyes and wore a dark blue ski outfit with the logo of Ambrose's resort stamped on the upper right chest part of his ski jacket.

"Hello, all. It's a pleasure to meet you." The man greeted, his voice even and sounding American in accent, giving a small smile and bowing in greeting.

"This is Percival, and don't let his plain style fool you. This main is basically the machine that runs my whole resort. While I just sign off for bills and look cute Percival is the head of security, runs the housekeeping staff, is the head chef for the kitchen and is basically my external conscience. He can also play a mean saxophone." Ambrose explained with a wide smile.

"You're too kind, Ambrose. I'm just doing my job - same as anyone else." Percival said with a humble smile.

"Just doing your job? Percy, you had your pick of any of the premier, luxury resorts even with your background as an expat in high demand. But not only did you chose to work for me in such an out of the way place but you even help out around the town here by chauffeuring people in the snow coach." Ambrose replied.

"Wow. Sounds like you're a regular Samaritan up here, Percival." Fujiko commented with a look of awe.

"Eh, I do what I can. And besides - I was all too happy to accept Ambrose's job proposal. The location of the resort is what hooked me in. It's nice and out of the way. You can do just about anything you want and no one would ever know." Percival replied, then paused as a peculiar smile crossed his face. "And places away from the public eye makes people more...honest about themselves, I've come to find."

The words made Lupin, Fujiko, Jigen and Goemon all blink a bit in surprise by Percival's words. And they shared a look with one another, silently asking what the man could have meant by that. But before they could try to ask Ambrose clapped his hands together enthusiastically, which got everyone's attention.

"Well then! Now that we've all exchanged names and the like, let's get you four to your suites at the resort. Percival and I will get your luggage. You all just settle into the snow coach." Ambrose said, gesturing to the ferrying snowmobile three yards away...

ARTIST STATEMENT

"Growing up, there were a lot of things that drew in my attention as a young lass. Of course I loved Studio Ghibli, Don Bluth's Anastasia, Dreamworks films, Sailor Moon, Pokemon, Gargoyles, the DC cartoons, Power Rangers and Winx Club. But the one anime, the one person, that truly moved me and inspired in a way that no other work has was that of Lupin the 3rd. And by extention Kazuhiko Kato/Monkey Punch became my hero.

I don't know what it was about Lupin that just drew me in. Perhaps it was a bit of a trend I had where I was into heroic criminals like Sly Cooper. Or maybe is it was the dynamic chemistry between the gang and Inspector Zenigata. Or maybe it's the rich history of how the franchise came to be. Or maybe it's because of how much Monkey Punch adored the franchise, even wishing that Lupin and the gang continued to have as many adventures as possible with his last moments on either.

Or maybe it's all of those things plus something I don't even fully know. But what I do know is this. Lupin, Fujiko, Goemon, Jigen and Zenigata have all played a crucial role in me becoming the person I am. So being apart of this Zine has not only been fun. It's been a dream come true."